Friday, October 29, 2010

Equality California Volunteer found a Noose on their office door and a Cop says: "Sometimes you just have to live with being a victim."


EQCA volunteer, Mel Distel found a noose hanging from their office door. Pretty shaken, Mel called the police, however that experience didn't make things any better.

Here's her take on what happened:

I couldn't get the image out of my head. I smoked a cigarette outside the office and my thoughts were spinning. I felt jumpy, and was startled when any person or car crossed my line of vision. This was a message of hate, and I felt unsafe. Inside the office, our phone bankers were shocked and hurting. They continued on with their phone bank calls (vote for Melissa Fox) and worked to stay focused on the task at hand.


I could not focus. I could barely make calls. I waited for the police to arrive, believing that when they did I would feel safe and affirmed.


When the police arrived, two officers spoke to Daniel and myself outside. The male officer dominated the conversation. There was nothing they could do, of course, there was no suspect and no crime had been committed. The officer said "what it is, is a string on a door." My vision got blurry, I was embarrased and felt stupid for making the call. I took a deep breath and said "Do you see any correlation between the fact that this is a gay office and there was a noose left on our door in the wake of all of these teen suicides?" The officer said, "Sometimes you just have to live with being a victim," and proceeded to mention that his car had been broken into before. As if that's the same. As if having your stereo stolen is anything like the message "You should kill yourself." As if random theft is anything like an act meant to convey hate and stir up fear in the heart of a minority group.


I want to thank Karla for having a long discussion with the sargeant about the situation. No, it was not legally a hate crime, because there was no crime (just hate). And the officer likely did not intend to come off the way he did.


But I'm still in shock. I pray that no officer ever tells a bullied teen that, "sometimes you just have to live with being a victim." The officer made me feel foolish for being shocked and afraid. I feel stupid and unjustified. Our volunteers felt hurt, angered and confused.

Why would a cop say something like that? Ridic! That officer needs to be held accountable for that.

2 comments:

Stan in NH said...

I agree. All these cops are supposed to have sensitivity training and understand what people are going through. So to even say something like that is a breach of public trust. There is never , and I do mean never, any reason whatsoever, for someone to tell someone else that it is OK to be a victim. It's unacceptable behavior, especially from a person who is paid by us to serve the public trust.
He's a disgrace to his uniform, and should be reprimanded in the strongest way possible.

Anonymous said...

I realize that the chances of catching the perpetrator were not good, but there surely could have been a better way to explain that.

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Viktor is a small town southern boy living in Los Angeles. You can find him on Twitter, writing about pop culture, politics, and comics. He’s the creator of the graphic novel StrangeLore and currently getting back into screenwriting.